Thanks for your response. But, the line that parents crosses that I see. Well I have experienced. When you know it’s covert incest when the parent actively encrouch and break your boundaries as a child. The parent views you as the “partner” and pits you against the spouse. The spouse becomes jealous of the dynamic. The spouse also become confused by the dynamic. You, as a child is confused too. But, at the same revels in this attention because it seems like some sort of love. As a child, I felt violated but I never understood why. It was because of Covert Incest. At times, this incestureous feeling that was imposed on me (even in adulthood) made me have unhealthy attachments to people who are seen as leaders. It has repercussions in your life that permeates. I didn’t realize it until I examined the dynamics later on. But, as a child, you basically feel a sense of violation of your boundaries without experiencing physical rape. It is a sort of emotional rape.
You are right that not all cases are covert incest. But, in my case, it was because most of the time, it was a persistent and direct violation of my emotional boundaries. It was putting me in the center of my parent’s relationship; pitting me against my mother that was incestrous; and making me fulfill adult like emotional needs of my father in place of my mother that was incesrous.